Work Life Balance: The Complexity and Sensitivity of Elder Care

Upon walking into my patients shared room at a nursing home recently, I found my client visibly thrilled with the company of her daughter, a 62 year old corporate business woman. My patient’s eyes were wide with enthusiasm. Although she spoke in another language and I couldn’t understand her words, she was much more aware and engaged than in recent days. Even when close to passing, my patients nearly always perk up when their children visit. But there was another observation, her daughter was visibly exhausted as she comes to visit her mom every night after work.

As a hospice volunteer I’m gifted to see, first hand, the remarkable patient response to the mere presence of another person who cares. They sometimes suddenly engage when someone holds their hand, speaks to them softly, or prays with them. But, just like the business woman I just mentioned, being present for your loved one while staying aware in the workplace has become more difficult than ever before.

In her blog this week, Cali Williams Yost, author of Work+Life: Finding the Fit That’s Right for You, writes about her experience taking care of her mom, and truly being present while her mom was in the final stages of her transition. That, while taking care of two young children.

"Even at its most difficult, caring for a child always involves the possibilities of the future. Caring for an aging or sick adult is about loss. Loss of the vibrant person. Loss of their pain-free existence and control over even the most mundane activities of life. And, ultimately, death. Because the work+fit equation is based on time and energy, the pervasive sadness of eldercare is an energy drain that doesn’t exist with childcare."

The human species is simply living longer. With that change, the landscape of the workplace is going through an abrupt shift. It’s not just about compassion, it’s soon to be about the bottom line. Big business will have to take a harder look at elder care.  Flexible working practices must be more carefully examined. In our 24/7 global marketplace, there’s no longer the choice of ignoring our elders.

Millions of baby boomers are now being called to serve as caregivers while still holding down a job. It’s not exactly a new phenomenon, but what’s new is that employers are faced with a new scenario – actively engage in elder care initiatives, or risk losing the wisdom of the baby boomers.